Monday, August 8, 2011

Step back and give way

It's been two years since that fateful day in July when my life changed, when you took something that I valued the most only to hurl it back on my face.  You took something precious, and yet you trampled it and laughed at my inexperience.  And throughout that period, I have always wondered when the day will come that I will become tired of loving you.  I am still praying for that day to come, so that my heart can accommodate or even contemplate the idea of falling in love with another person who may want me.

I was up all night replaying the conversations that we recently had.  I realized that all of a sudden, I am now the outsider in this story.  I wonder if this is my perpetual role in life-- to step back and give way...  Truly, there must be someone out there that fate solely intended for me right?

I have given everything that I have already.  Sometimes, I try to squeeze myself for more.  But what can I do?  There's nothing much that I can do from here.  I have to stay away now and let him find his own way back to me--if that's what's supposed to be.  If not, then I have to find my own way and just hope that everything is just part of the journey that I have to take.

Most of the times, I worry that one day, my heart will literally  give up on me.  That it might not be as resilient as I thought it was.  But then I know that one day, it will get better...  I mean, surely, I'm not a tragic story right?

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